Dear Aunt B,
So theres this girl in my grade, amanda, and she literaly gets all the guys. Shes not ugly, but shes not drop dead gorgeous, if you know what i mean. She has a few extra pounds. Shes always saying how shes so self concious, but she still gets all the guys. She is 14 and has had atleast 15 boyfriends in about 3 or 4 years. I know some of them dont really count, because it was in about 5th grade but still! I can't stand her. There is this new guy in my grade who i think is wicked hot. And she is all over him. I'm so sick of it. It's so old. And he like loves her! She has alot of classes with him and i dont have any. She talks to him on myspace all the time too. What can i do to get him to talk to me? And why are all the guys in my grade obsessed with amanda? -Sick of it
Hey Sick of It,
Well, you said that she's had around 15 boyfriends in the past few years. And now you say that there's a guy that you think is really hot, and he likes her. If history repeats itself, they probably won't be together for too long. I can definitely see where you'd be sick of her always getting all the boys though. And I can definitely see where it's frustrating that she has a lot of classes with him, and you don't have any, but unfortunately there's nothing you can do about that.
To answer your questions, the first one, how can you get him to talk to you? Just talk to him. You don't need to wait for him to come talk to you, or do something that will make him talk to you. You can go talk to him, see what he's about. You can also go on MySpace or Facebook and talk to him. And if you don't have either of those, talk to him on the phone, or email. As for your second question, they're obsessed with her, well that's guys. See a beautiful girl and talk to her. And you said she's not drop dead gorgeous, but everybody has their own tastes. And maybe they all talk to her because she has a great personality. I understand where you might not see it, because all the guys are gaga over her, but to the guys, she could very well be fun to talk to and hang around.
Well, I hope I was able to answer you a little, give you a little advice, and really, all you have to do is talk to him. That's the best I can tell you, get to know him between classes. I hope it works out for you!
Dear Sick of It,
It all comes down to how you think and act, how you carry yourself. If you feel like crap and act like you feel like crap about yourself, crap you shall be. But if you look in the mirror, adjust how you feel and realize that no one and I mean no one is better than you, you'll walk away a different person. You must always be real with yourself, improve what you can, work with what God gave you and treat others as you want them to treat you.
See, Amanda lives her life in an assertive manner. Assertive chicks get what they want. You must also become assertive. How bad do ya want it?
I would say that life and our perception of it is probably 90% fiction and 10% fact. It's all in how we perceive other people and as well as, how they perceive us. If you carry yourself with confidence, a confident young woman you shall be. You must begin to empower yourself, your reality with an understanding that, as I stated before, no one is better than you. You must begin to exude this confidence, the kind of confidence that when you walk in the room, people notice. This comes from believing in yourself. So Aunt B, how do I "empower myself?"
You've lived this long, being you and who knows you better than you? So, only you can make these life changes and only you have the power to make it happen. It's all a matter of how strongly you want it? You will not suffer for doing your homework and reading as many tags (keywords on my sidebar) concerning empowerment. I have 21 posts with the label "Empowerment," 8 on empowerment advice and 19 on empowerment practices. Please read some of these and begin to redefine yourself.
I believe every word of what I write. As well, I once was a young woman with an awful sense of self-esteem. It took me years to figure out that no one was better than me. It took me years to understand that I am three people;
I am who you think I am,
I am who I think I am,
I am who I really am.
You may be whomever you choose to be. This is true even if you really felt ugly, not so bright, not the funniest person or whatever. It all depends on how you choose to carry yourself. You see that Amanda is not the prettiest thing to walk down the pike yet she's able to get the guy. Why is that? It is because she believes in herself.
The secret is; Once you begin to see what it is that I'm talking about, once you begin to believe in it and are willing to set goals for your own self-esteem, well, G-Friend, you are gonna RULE!
Keeping It Real,