Monday, October 22, 2007

Did You Let Go of the Reigns???; Continued

We try to never leave you hanging. If our answer has not been helpful, we always welcome your feedback and response, as well as giving you the opportunity to reiterate your question. We'll work with you, till we get an amicable answer to your question.

Such is the case with our Reader, known as "Von El." After posting his answer, he wrote back that I had not answered his question. This is a continuation from the prior post, "Did You Let Go of the Reigns???"
He said;

thanks 4 answering my first question, hmm lets c, your answer does not help me at all,. i asked u how 2 get this girl out of my life, yet u talk about other things that has no use to me at all,, plain and simple how do i get it through the girl's head i hate her so "uckin much and never contact me ,,, how the *uk do i make her realize that i dont want her in my life at all and 2 leave me alone ,, those r the only answers i seek,, me and her were good friends before and i wont get into the details but i will say this the *itch bak stabbed me 2 many times ,, i dont want anything 2 do with her,,, ,, so u can c where i am coming from,, and try not 2 judge me again because u really have no idea what type of person i am ,,,,, your advice?

I then asked permission to answer his question by publishing it? He then wrote an additional addition to his original email;

but also let me add other stuff 2 the new questions i have asked u and make more comments and u can also add them to post i have sent u because i want u 2 have all the details,

she and i used 2 hang out before and we became good friends, then things started 2 get sour between us, i was not the 1 who was doing it.. she started bak stabbing me, i let it slide, then she did it again, and then i let it slide again, and what u know she did it again, but this time it cost me my job, and every 1 i knew at work thought i was a evil person, a lot of people looked at me differently, the cops got involved,, my name is ruined, i mean what the heck man is this how u r suppose 2 treat your friends? then she moved out of state, i was very happy with that, i prayed day and night she wont ever come to the state where i am living, but then she started 2 send me friend requests through friendster and myspace, i cant *uckin stand the *itch at all, i hate her soooooooo much, i am not a bad person, i told her so many times i have changed i dont care about her at all, yet she thinks its all a joke,, i dont care if she wins by making me angry, i hate the *itch, plain and simple, oh my goodness, u have no idea how i "uckin hate her,, everytime i c her sending me stuff i feel more and more angry, i just want her out of my life, after what she has put through i just want her out of my life, i have no *uckin feeling 4 the *itch anymore, only hatred and anger, oh god how i hate the *itch,,

Dear Von-el,

Seems to me that you have already done what you can to be rid of this girl. Choosing who you are friends with on the pages, that is entirely up to you. In myspace, you can go here: and it walks you through it.

If you want to delete a friend from Friendster do this: In order to delete a friend you must go to your own home page, select the ACTION Edit Friends, and then select the OBJECT of the Delete Friend action. This only saves clicks if

you're deleting many friends at once (hopefully, this is not a very common operation!).

But on a totally different note, dude.. you need some therapy. Anger management is what it is called, and you are lacking in reason right now. What if this girl was to come and see you? What are you going to do then? My thought is in the rage that you are in towards her that you might not do what you would normally do.. but go off the depend. You need some serious help, and that is something that we cannot give you.

Babs was trying to tell you that the only way you can tell someone to leave you alone, is simply that. Tell them to leave you alone. You can’t bend peoples wills, or make them do exactly what you want. All you can do is state what you don’t want, which is contact from her. And quite plainly she was trying to address your problem, which is the anger issue you so evidently have.

And one other thing, and this is separate from the advice, because you do need the advice. But when people are asking a question about a harassing person in their lives, it helps not to take that tone yourself. You were being quite belligerent towards Babs and her offer of assistance. So maybe think about how you approach people, especially if you are asking for HELP (both solutions were easy enough to Google by the way).


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