"Self-Will Run Riot"

Dear Aunt B,

My Name is Beth and I am 24 years old from Colorado..A few months ago or more like since January I met this guy through some friends of mine and I had a little crush on him for a while but ended up getting over him.. or so I thought. anyway, I started to pray for him ( we both are christian and go to the same church and what not and have the same group of friends). for a while and still now I have been praying that we continue to be good friends and that we would talk and everything.. well God sure seemed to answer those prayers. I only prayed for him every night when I went to bed like I did for all of my other friends and thanking God for putting them into my life and everything. well..the last few weeks I started noticing how I started to pray for him much more during the day than i did my other friends. It is getting to the point to where I almost go through a whole day just praying for him and I feel like God has put him on my heart for some reason even though the chances of us being in a relationship is very unlikely. I don't even know why or where even it started (the constant praying for him part came from). I have been trying to force myself to get my mind off of him and it is not happening.. for a long time it seemed to work. I have never had this problem before with getting over crushes (even ones that I saw all the time).Then Last night I had this dream out of nowhere that he and I were slowdancing in a school gym with a few other people and I dreamed that he was the one for me and everything. I don't know if you can help me with advice or if you know much of how to help me in my situation and such.. I have been trying really hard to get over him and none of this has ever happened to another guy I know ever before and I totally thought I was over him and such. I am asuming that I am just over reacting to this and am over analyzing...but I don't know.. what are your thoughts?
Thanks,
Beth
Dear Beth,

Well my friend, a couple things come to mind as points to ponder;

#1 Are are thinking about him because you've stepped up your prayers for him, thus the dreams. And vice-versa?

#2 Are you forcing your wants and desires, in the form of prayer?

#3 While I hear you say that you are praying, are you allowing time for God to speak to you, in and within this dialogue?

First, I wanted to commend you in your devotions. Too often, I do believe people fall into the rhetoric of ritualistic behaviors. What I mean is that they view prayer as something you do at a certain time, every day or right before bed, etc.

In truth, just as you might stay on the line with your bestest of bestest friend, <---(a Babzism)sharing in all things, good, bad and grateful, this is how it should be with our Lord. Stay on the line, after all, there's no long distance fee!!!

I do believe things changed for me when I realized that to stay in constant dialogue with God was quite beneficial to/for me. As well, when I began to see even the smallest things to rejoice in and be grateful for, I am and was comforted.

But even for me, I find myself wanting to run the show. Good ol' "self-will run riot." And all my life, I've wanted to drive the car even though I kept wrecking it. I have to learn to allow the Lord to do the driving as well as "Letting Go & Letting God," in so many aspects of my life.

So, I only speak from experience when I say these things. I also was praying, blurting out things and never taking the time to shush up and listen. I am still convicted of this but that does not mean I won't pass on the tidbit to you hoping you'll conquer in this quest, this journey.

My advice to you would be to continue in your prayer but may I suggest that you speak to our Lord asking him for His will to be done, in all things. Change up things a bit and ask our heavenly Father for divine guidance, wisdom and for your wants and desires to be conducive and in line with His will.

Yes, I'd say that concentrating on this way of thinking will become your answer.

"I will also agree with you, in prayer, this very minute, that all things will be done for the good of and by the grace of our wonderful God. You must seek His face. Yes, seek His face. We'll pray for divine intervention on your behalf. If this fella is the one for you, he will be ordained by God Himself. If he is not your Mr. Right, God will heal your heart by steering you in the right direction. Remember; our Father, when He closes one door, He always opens another. May He bless you, shine upon you with His heavenly Light and show you the way. I also ask that Christ/Yeshua might set about finding you a mate that is hand picked. And may He illuminate your future husband. Whether it be this fellow or not, we can agree, in prayer, that our Lord's will be done and that you and your mate will be to the glory of The Father!"

Listen and be still. Listen for that small still voice to guide your way...

Keeping It Real,

Aunt B



Dear Reader,

God is not putting this bloke into your head, you are. And there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. Now all you need is a little gumption.

Why? Because you need to ask this guy out. Seriously.

You have a huge crush on this guy, and you are friends, you hang out already, so what’s the big set back? I’m pretty sure you can ask him out on a date, and think you really should.

This is an out and out case of a big crush, and wanting to see if it can lead to more. Maybe he is shy, or maybe he doesn’t know how you feel, but he is not asking you out so far, so why not just ask him? The only way you are ever going to figure out if he is meant for you, is by getting to know him on a different level, and I’m sorry honey but praying for him ain’t gonna make that happen. YOU can make things happen, by action.

Be brave! Take a chance! ASK HIM OUT!

Good Luck :)

~Xmichra

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