Friday, July 18, 2008

Building Blocks

Hi Aunt B!

My name is roxxie and im 19 years based in pretoria south africa and i just want closure on a relationship i am in!
how do u know wen a man loves u!? my ex boyfriend always breaks up wit me wen we have a fight! he is a very difficult man because he had a terrible childhood! we neva go out and he always wants to stay at home! the last fite we had was when i pretended i was sum 1 else on the phone and i was asking questions because i felt he was cheating on me! he found out it was me and he told me its ova because i shouldnt b so stupid to believe he would cheat on me! he told me to go away becoz we will neve work out! its only been 2 days since the break up and he walks past my shop where i work!! y does he do this to me? do u tink his cheating!? do u tink he loves me but doesnt know how to show it? hes a man full of violence and anger and im a kind loving raring girl and very christian...y does he keep coming back?

kind regards

Dear Reader,

Dear Roxxie,

It sounds like you both need to just let this one go.

The primary building block in a relationship is trust and friendship. And from what you have just said, neither of those things are present in this relationship (which is bad coming from a 6 line explanation of this). If you care for someone, you don’t pretend to be another person and bait him or her. That is deception in it’s finest and a horrible game to play on someone you are suppose to trust. You also don’t break up at the first sign of disagreement. That shows lack of respect, which walks hand in hand with friendship.

Personally, I would look at this as an opportunity to see the mistakes you have both made and use that knowledge to better future relationships. You are very young, and relationships can be tricky at this age. But being with someone who doesn’t respect you, or you don’t respect him or her, that is a recipe for disaster.

Take this as a life lesson of what not to do, and what you are looking for in a relationship and walk away.


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