Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Measure of a True Friend

dear x ,
i have one problem.My best friend is going out with the school screw up. He takes drugs and he is in a gang. should i tell my friend he is so wrong for her ?

Lost in friendship and relationship

Dear Lost,

The measure of a true friend is telling us the things that we don’t want to hear, but also to be supportive when we disagree. Somewhat contradictory huh?

Do you know for sure that he takes drugs? Do you know for sure that he is part of a gang? Or is this just common perception? Sometimes the biggest mistake you can make is to prematurely judge a person. So make sure your concern is valid, or you just might lose your friend.

Essentially what I think holds true though, is that if you are true friends you should be able to voice your concern about this guy, but also be open to accept her decision. And sometimes that is really difficult when it puts the person you care for in a bad situation.

You should tell your friend that you are concerned and try not to vent off on how bad this guy is for her, this will only make her defensive and mad. Just be honest with her, and hopefully she will show you if you are wrong, or take your advice and get out of that relationship.

Good Luck with the talk,


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