Dear Aunt Babz--
I am a thirty year-old single male
Rotting in the Rockies
Seems to me that you are having a crisis of personality. When a person can’t “do” what it is they have as a passion, that depression seeps in and takes over. But you can at least see this, so you might be able to change it.
First, your mood has to change. I know it sounds so easy, but it really is hard to have a positive outlook when things are just not going your way. Still, if you are down, so will the chances of getting better.
Second, take up employment wherever you can find it. This is not the time to be sitting and waiting for the perfect job to come at you. You need to prove your worth, and you can’t do that sitting down. Get a job to earn a pay check, and volunteer at a more international development type place (like the Red Cross, hospital, local shelter or youth organization). Especially in a small town, you aren’t likely to get into that field unless you have connections. This is how you make them.
Having dreams and goals is not a bad thing; it gives us the drive to succeed. But it is only in the act of waking up and living on that a dream can be realized. Be the person in control of your own destiny, and get up! Don’t let the things that are situational (like living quarters, relationship standing and employment) destroy what is non-conditional (like attitude, drive and the joy of life). Once you start writing your own ticket, you’ll see the changes.
Good luck with the job hunt, and with your future.
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